Keeping My Word May Kill Me..

 this was this morning after getting off the phone with the newly assigned Social Worker on my Foster's case. In one question she filled me with relief, and choked with despair.
So I took my bobbins to school, smoked two Djarums, and forced myself to distraction while I waited for one to do what they must. Then checked my levels as we beheaded home.
Its better, but still in dangerous levels.. now I get to go home and clean, and try to hold myself together.. because every step from today feels like a nail in my wolf's coffin...
A step closer to his salvation and demise.

This is write here, in my blood if I could. I will never keep her from her kin. If she asks, I will take her to see them, regardless of what happens moving forward. By life, and my goddess, this I so swear.
They may ask for visits, she will have a yes/no vote, and I will abide. So I breathe, so it is.

But I voice here, too, a warning for those who know me. If I loss my wolf, you will lose me. We are in lockstep for survival at this point.

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