I find I am moderately jealous of R, largely because she can openly do what I wish to. K on the hand, when that green monster rose, it had other reasons. That witch tried to claim a thing that I saw as mine, and worse, tried to make that thing something it was not. My Wolf is no one's property! And only ‘my Wolf’ in the sense that I get to love him, for he is his own person and free to do what he will, you dumb narcissistic cunt. So back the fuck off and stop whining to me about how you can't stop thinking of someone you didn't fully appreciate anyway! Step off! Or Bast will be petitioned to end your toxicity so that your child may thrive!
my kids think I dont put them first
If they only knew... if I were selfish, I'd have left them here with E years ago, without a word.. before the eldest moved out on their own, I'd have left. I'd have left when E left the first bruise (accidentally, though it was) on their arm while restraining them to punish them for something I can't even remember today. I'd have left E the day he accidentally choked my youngest, who was only trying to protect they're elder sibling from the wrath they felt sure they saw in his eyes after learning the middle had self-harmed. Blaming me for not checking on them, when the greater harm had been to the middle and I was checking on them! Protecting the middle from what I saw was the greater threat, E. But I stay here! To protect their ungrateful asses from the man I said vows to, though every second of every day I regret it deeper and deeper in my heart. My kids don't think I put them first when I find solace of any kind in the proximity of O - but they...have......
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