Selfish, yea, maybe.

HOW the fuck do I make this work?!? I want YOU, but I can’t have you without breaking vows that were already made… Neither of us approve of the ‘cheating’ scene; but we’re both head over kester for the other… I can’t break vows without ruining some measure of what trust you still have in me. I won’t ‘cheat’ as that will ruin what trust remains. But both of us feel what we feel, fight it as I have. I didn’t want to fall for you, I was content in my place, accepting of my chosen lot; and then you, with your battle-scars and broken spirit, entered into my orbit. You with all the physic I’ve always been drawn to, the physic that always caught my eye when I was out and about living my life. Tall, less lanky than I’d normally go for (David Tenant, Benedict Cumberbatch), but built sturdy. With a body like yours, it’s no wonder others have been attracted to you. I could feel jealousy towards every woman that looked at you sideway; could, and do. I want to be able to ‘show you off like a side of meat’ because I would be so very proud of having you at my side. Not because you’re a handsome guy, but because you have a golden heart.