Appetite

I want him, want to taste him, feel him, be close to him. But I worry that if I break down and accept these physical demands, he will still want me after that, or will it destroy what we have?

Will he still love me when he finds I'm not as experienced in body as I am in mind? Will he hold the break against me, and find reason to think me disloyal to everything I want to be for him?

My polyamorous mind is ready for monogamy with him. I want to be only his, and he only mine. It's not my place to ask it, I'm all too aware (married as I am), but I can't deny that I want only him; only the wolf, and I want to be his hellkatt through and through.

I want to be able to finally be free of the beast born of rage and pain, and enable him to do the same. I want to heal us both, together, for each other.

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